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Items included in this column are things that I have heard, seen or have been reported to me. I cannot vouch for their veracity.

The NFL holds a tremendous fascination for American sports fans. Even the 17 televised hours of the annual draft have high ratings. In fact, the ratings are so high that the draft outdraws the NBA playoffs, which are currently in full swing.

The high level of interest in watching a bunch of men make a guess at who’s gonna turn out to be a blue chipper (followed by 15 minutes of mindless filler) is even more incredible when you consider the level of competition for the viewers.

As mentioned, the NBA playoffs compete for the fans’ attention. Of course, the NHL playoffs and the beginning of the baseball season are also in progress. Some say that fan interest in The Draft is starting to rival the Super Bowl. I suppose it makes some difference that every fan still has a stake in the proceedings.

Years ago, when ESPN first expressed interest in televising the event, former NFL Commissioner Pete Rozelle balked. He felt nobody would be interested in watching such dull stuff.

In addition to the draft day TV coverage, every NFL team sponsors a draft day party. Typically, the teams charge $25 or $30 for fans to sit in a room and watch the progress on a big screen TV. Adult beverages, at inflated prices, are served while the attendees cheer and boo at the choices 32 teams make.

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers even sponsor a 5K Draft Day Dash. Runners/fans at the Tampa draft day party are given every opportunity to build up a thirst. A team that was a perennial loser has been transformed. The Bucs have sold out every game of every season since they opened their new stadium. They have a 100,000 fans on a waiting list for season tickets.

Meanwhile, Minnesotans are enjoying recurring episodes of “Stadium Fatigue,” a soap opera based in the Minnesota State Legislature. This season, the storyline revolves around financing (What A Shock). Current plots focus on who, rather than whether the financing will happen. Early season episodes had Hennepin County residents as major contributors. More recent programs involve Metro area or taxpayers from across the state having opportunities for investment.

(I wrote this item on April 30, for inclusion in the May 4 issue of the Press. There’s been so much sports to report the last few weeks that we haven’t had the space to include this column. Many Minnesotans, including me, are surprised that the State Legislture passed two stadium bills in 2006.)

Did you hear about the two 17 year olds out looking for a way to finance their Friday night drive. The two young Einsteins were out in the dark siphoning gas from a car. Seeing another car approaching, they rushed to remove the siphoning hose. In the process, one spilled gas on his clothes. Feeling the liquid soaking his clothes, he did the only logical thing. He took out his lighter to see what was causing this problem. Needless to say, this did not end well.

Economist John Kenneth Galbraith (JKG) died recently at the age of 97. During his long career, he served as an advisor to five U.S. Presidents, beginning with FDR and ending with Bill Clinton. Galbraith advised President Kennedy and JFK appointed him to be the Ambassador to India.

One of the things that JKG is said to have admired most about Kennedy was his candor. The two men had breakfast together in the White House the day that Galbraith left for New Dehli.

During their conversation, the President asked what JKG thought about the article written about the new Ambassador in that morning’s paper. Galbraith responded that he liked the story, but did not like that the author had referred to him as “arrogant.”

“Why not?” JFK said. “Everyone else does.”

Teacher Hazel Haley recently retired from her position in Lakeland, Florida. She taught in the same school for 69 of her 89 years. According to Haley, kids aren’t much different today than in the past. However, she also noted that today’s students don’t learn for the sake of learning. Rather, “they learn it for the test, and then flush it.”

My elderly father has recently moved and we’ve been going through some of his possessions, trying to out some of the unneeded stuff. Among his belongings, we found an ad that had been in an advertising paper similar to the “Search.” It said, “ For Sale...John Deere Tractor....No Seat, No Steering Wheel....For the man who’s lost his ass and has no where to turn.

A recent survey listed America’s Unsexiest Men. Near the top of the list were TV talk show host Dr. Phil, movie critic Roger Ebert, filmmaker Ron Howard and actor Brad Pitt. Pitt reportedly has personal cleanliness issues.

You are invited to send interesting, unusual and/or humorous items that could possibly be used in this space. If you choose to do so, please send it to [email protected].

If you prefer, you may send it to

Chisago County Press

Attn: Dave

12631 Lake Blvd.

Lindstrom, Mn 55045

or, you may bring it in to the office.

Sports stuff would be great, but, please do not limit yourselves. Politics, religion, culture (pop or otherwise) are welcomed. Please do not feel offended if your contribution is not included.

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